What it is really like to be diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) as an adult

By Amy Goodman, Co-Director of the Autism NOW Center, at The Arc of the United States

Amy Goodman

Amy Goodman

In the recent past, Jerry Seinfeld had mentioned that he might be on the autism spectrum and then he had to backtrack and say he wasn’t on the spectrum. Because of a play he saw that was about autism, he thought he had some connection to it. That is all fine and dandy, but what about individuals who have been diagnosed with it as an adult and live with it every day. I just wanted to say that autism, ASD, or Asperger’s is nothing to be taken lightly. It is a developmental disability that affects how one thinks and it is the reactions that one has to the environment around them.

To me what it means to be diagnosed as an adult is this: It meant I finally found what I had been searching for, for more than 30 years. It meant closure of something looming over me. It meant satisfaction in me and my life in general. It was a relief to put a name to my idiosyncrasies and it gave me understanding and wisdom.

I was able to take responsibility for my life, make new plans on what I wanted to do with myself and I was able to put the pieces together and step through the next hurdle in my life. It gave me freedom to explore new opportunities and to see myself for who I am. I had a new found confidence and I realized I’m not different, that I do have a purpose and it also allowed me follow my dreams and go in a totally new direction.

It opened my eyes and washed away all my guilt that I had about myself and my abilities; therefore I was able to move forward with my new life. It gave me a whole new understanding of myself. The understanding was this that I am who I am and I am not bad, diseased, or broken. I have a name for all my challenges but that it is not a label, it is not bad, it just is. It is part of who I am and it will always be with me, but in the end does it really matter that I am on the spectrum? No, it does not. I am a human first and I have a name, Amy, autism or Asperger’s does not define me. So, I stopped obsessing over it, embraced it for what it is and I used my characteristics to help me to identify my next steps.

I took those next steps and I found that I am lovable, capable, and that I can do better than what others thought I was capable of doing. In fact, I have expanded my horizons and have even impressed myself with what I can do.

It means you know who you are, and it helped me to identify what I needed to do and by having this new found knowledge I was able to help others to see the light as well. Individuals with autism and Asperger’s are capable, bright, and able to achieve all of their dreams and then some if they just put their mind to it. Some individuals may need more help along the way than others, but don’t ever let anyone tell you “you can’t” because the reality is you can.

Dream big, live life to the fullest, and be happy. Do what you are meant to do. Being diagnosed as an adult gave me inspiration to do something, that something was go to graduate school and get my Master’s in Special Education with a minor in autism, so do something and make something of yourself. It can be done, if you have hope, happiness, and faith and you will succeed. Don’t give up, always remember to smile and remember this: No is not the answer. Yes is always the answer and what was the question? Oh I guess I forgot oh well it doesn’t matter because the answer will always be what you want it to be. That is yes, I can Yes, I will and Yes, I did. I conquered it and now that is all I have to say.